Being a girl can be tough. Let’s face it!
When I visited an all girls orphanage in Patiala, in the northern state of India, Punjab, I realized how lucky I am.
I was there to film for a BBC Three documentary I presented, India: A Dangerous Place To Be A Woman.
As a young British Indian and journalist, I wanted to go to India to uncover the reality of life for women there, six months after a young medical student was brutally gang-raped on board a bus in the Indian capital Delhi.
The story made international headlines and shocked the world.
I have visited India many times and spent time there. As my ancestral homeland, India is a fascinating place.
Full of rich culture and colour, its spiritual vibrancy can be seen everywhere and I feel a deep sense of belonging here.
At the orphanage I didn’t know what to expect. I walked in and was met with the most incredible young Indian girls.
Thirty or more, there were tiny baby girls to gorgeous young teenagers. Some were bold – laughing and singing, others were coy, hiding and playing with their toys.
Full of heart and soul, I had never seen such warm smiles. I was truly taken aback.
Girls in this home have been abandoned by their parents for various reasons, be it economic or fear for their future and marriage prospects.
But all their stories boil down to one main reason: being a girl. There’s a common mindset throughout India that a girl is a burden.
In a deep-rooted culture, sons are raised superior to daughters. Boys are seen as the ones that can only provide for the family and carry on the lineage.
Demands for dowry can translate into parents struggling to fulfill their final duty, their daughter’s rite of passage at the time of marriage. It’s no wonder then girls are abandoned.
Veena aunty who runs the orphanage, raises each girl child as her own, educates them, inspires them and teaches them to stand on their own two feet. When coming of age, she can also find them a prince charming and a loving family – without demands for dowry.
As a proud parent, she gives each precious girl away in marriage as her own.
Whatever bitter personal story they all shared with me; the love ouzing from every corner of this orphanage makes it a truly sweet, humble abode.
In Hindi there’s a well known phrase that a daughter is the goddess of her family and home – ‘Ghar ki Lakshmi.’
This place was a home to many Lakshmi’s’. Beautiful and intelligent, respected and sacred.
Heena, one of the oldest in the orphanage, now 21, has been there for 17 years. Heena told me her mother gave her and her sister up to the orphanage, saying she could no longer raise them – but kept Heena’s brother.
I asked Heena if she would ever like to see her mother again.
She said No, this is my home. These girls are all my sisters. I have over 30 sisters! We shared a few tears, hugged and smiled together.
These wonderful individuals have proved being born a girl child in India is not a curse, she is not a burden or a weaker sex, from the day she is born to the last breath of her life.
I’ve shared their heartache, heard disturbing tales and witnessed a fighting spirit within them all. A burning desire to rise up, face every challenge, overcome it and stand tall.
I’m a young British Indian woman and I love being a girl!
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